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Winner omits the Control!

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Happy November, everyone, Frank N. Foode™ here, and I’ve got the results of the 2013 Frankenfood Carving and Costume Contest. This year, we had some very creative, geeky, politicky and foodie entries, and it was a difficult decision. But our judges have indeed declared the winners, and they will be showered with prizes and fame! Let’s see what creativity our readers have up the sleeves of their lab coats!

First, we have a very skillful Bazinga Pumpkin carved by paulakmanser, with the precision that could have only been displayed by Dr. Sheldon Cooper himself – or a very close approximation.

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soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of cucurbit…

Next, MaryM gives us a topical representation of a scary scarecrow, about to make soup from an unsuspecting pepo. Apparently, this little cartoonish spokesperson hasn’t yet found the source of all the meat that Chipotle serves, but, they are still somehow making vegetarianism also seem sinister…

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Do pumpkins have meat? Let’s find out!

Now, Wyoweeds shares a great and spooky contribution, an actual genetically engineered sugar beet, looking downright diabolical. Who knew that improving weed control could look… so… questionable? Seriously, though, not everyone knew what it was!

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I will force you not to use multiple herbicides. Muh hahhh hahh!

Now in all this excitement, Karl’s ghostly butternut squash snuck up on lil’ ol’ unsuspecting me… but I somehow doubt he’ll have the votes to win, since he had to recuse himself.

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Don’t DO That!

Next, we have a group costume entry, by HawaiiAgwife, who depicts the enslavement of Mother Nature by Frankencorn and the devilish Anton Kester. She didn’t have a chance!

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Mother Nature, enslaved by her own creations?

Great costumes! Not only detailed and festive, but also great political and social commentary. You see, “Anton Kester” was a fake person created on Facebook to demonize this family, who were active in their community, yet, working for the seed companies that were being targeted by that very community in the debate over Kaua’i bill 2491. Even the councilmembers who introduced the bill “friended” Anton on facebook. But they turned it around, and made fun of it! For that we are awarding them our second prize AND our Young Dr. Frank N. Foode award for the Anton and his corny sidekick! A relief package will be on its way to Kaua’i with a book, tote bag, and some Norman Borlaug coins and veggie erasers for the big family effort.

Now, we finally reach our first place winner. We try our very best to ensure a quality peer review process for our community contests, with rigorous analysis of data, careful weighing of alternate hypotheses, and proper sample sizes to reach a scientifically repeatable outcome. But when we saw the sensational submission by Todd Jenkins, we knew that we had our winner. Behold, the first replication of Seralini’s GMO tumor experiment!

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♫♪♫♪We don’t neeeeed no replicaaation! We don’t neeeeed to show the control! ♪♫♪♫ Hey! Leave the journal alone! ♪♫♪♫

Look at those lumps! Clearly, with crazy potentially pre-cancerous tumors and bicolor phenotypes like this, it must be due to being GMO, or R, or GMO + R, and we don’t need to see the control groups for comparison, oh no! It is far more important that we get these shocking revelations out to the world, without the critical review of other experts in the field, than bother with mundane things like study design. (I hear these treatment groups were n=1 samples per group, which is proof enough for the internet.) So without further ado, is it my pleasure to announce the first place winner of the 2013 Frankenfood carving contest is Todd Jenkins, who will get first pick of a book from our prize page, a blog-themed tote bag, and a beautiful hand-turned wooden pen donated by Jim at West Side Designs.

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Let’s see… Hickory… Cedar… what, no GMO Chestnut?

I know you are jealous! If you missed this contest, never fear, we shall have another in the near future. I hope you have had as much fun as I have seeing this community come alive come back from the dead and spook the world with these laboratory creations! Now for some parting entertainment, look at the pumpkin festivities at NASA!

Show offs.

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